Many years before I got together with my boyfriend, I had a sex thing with this guy that I thought was relationship-material. He not only had an amazing body but a great personality as well. I was honest when I met him that I was looking for something more than just sex, and he led me to believe that was what he wanted, too. Between having mind-blowing sex, we ordered in, played video games, and watched movies, couple-y type things but without the label. But when I tried to get him to go to a show or out to dinner with me, he refused. My frustration grew as the months went on, and one day I confronted him. When I realized that he was ashamed of being seen with me, I felt as if I had been punched in the stomach — a place where much of my pain already resided. He did me a favor by not continuing to lead me on. Otherwise, I might still be trying to prove to him that I was worth any shit he might have gotten from other people. If I was still his secret shame, I might not have met my boyfriend, so thanks, athletic-asshole.
Dating as a polyamorous woman brings with it a lifetime's worth of misconceptions and jealousies. Add a few extra layers of fat to that experience, and things can get depressing real fast. As a non-single, fat, polyamorous woman, I can't tell you how often I've been questioned about my confidence, self-worth, who I am, and why I'm into what I'm into. And I'm not the only one who feels this way. For anyone who's going to date a fat woman at some point in their life, here are some tips for not ruining your chances to get with all this. If literally the only reason you are interested in me is because I'm fat, you might want to take a step back and get to know a bit about me first. I don't mind if you tend to date fat girls, or really even if you get some specific pleasure from being with a fat woman -- but I don't need that to be the first thing you tell me about yourself. Guys tend to do this in a reassuring way, I think. I don't need to be reassured.
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Don't tell me I'm not fat!
Jump to navigation. Tasha Fierce is a writer living in the occupied Tongva territory known as Los Angeles. You can follow them on Twitter at tashajfierce and read more of their work on their website. There's a lot of misinformation around the web about sex and fat people.
The king-size bed is inset into a floor-to-ceiling window. The room is lit from below and everything glows warm. Our Nikes are on the floor next to our clothes. All black. I hear the water running and watch as he washes me off his hands and rinses me from his mouth. We just gave the neighborhood below quite the show.